Four life lessons I learned in the last five months of being in the British Parliamentary Debating
Arguining has been a companion of mine as far as I can remember. I am one of those people who would not shy away from any argument. Yes, sometimes people have complained that I am annoying, but that is who I am. While my love for arguments kept growing day by day, the way I dealt with that urge to argue has changed significantly over time. From an annoying kid who annoys others with contentions that I think are very valid but actually not, to someone who manages to leverage critical thinking to things that actually matter. I have debated on fairly large platforms and a few of the proudest moments in my life are built around such instances. However, during the last few months, there had been some serious disruptions in my view of the art of debating.
As I started my Master’s degree in the UK, the first club I went out looking for was the debate union. While I was excited to be in an environment I can be comfortable, I realized that there is a very steep learning curve before I start to thrive within this new environment. I know that many of my readers are not very excited to know the nitty-gritty of the British Parliamentary style of debating. Even if you are, I am sure there are much better sources to learn that, than this. This is focused on dissecting and discussing some life lessons I learned through it. You don’t have to be a debater to acknowledge the value of these perspectives.
There are always two sides to a story.
A typical trait of picking topics to argue within debates is that we start with the assumption that there are always two sides to any topic we get. It might not look obvious as soon as you look at a topic. However, it is the skill of the debater to find the not-so-obvious arguments that make the difference. In my personal experience, I find the final arguments we come up to be most effective when we get into the not-so-obvious side of the argument. Whatever the topic is, you can always find at least one strong angle that can win you the argument.
Even in life, it is highly unlikely that you will always get what you want or expect. More often than not, you end up getting surprises that demand you to alter your status quo. The immediate response of us in such instances is always to resist. This can lead you to disconnect from the disruption that is happening in your life and end up missing out on opportunities. However, if you manage to develop the skill of finding that silver lining in anything, you can unlock those hidden gems. Practising to see the hidden angles in tough questions can train your brain to do this very effectively.
You don’t get to pick the side you want to sit.
It is very common to have your own opinion about the topics that you might receive within debating. It is even likely that there are some strong personal opinions attached to some of those topics. However, no matter how committed you are as an individual to a specific topic, you don’t get to pick the side you want to take within an argument. You might end up opposing a topic that you hold very close to you or proposing something that you vigorously despise.
While there is the option of opting out of that particular debate, you can learn some excellent life skills by taking up such challenges when debating. Topic selectors go out of their way to make sure that the topics they come up with will not directly offend anyone. Therefore, when I see a topic that I have strong opinions about, I like to think that I might have not considered all options before coming to that personal conclusion. Then as soon as I start to collect arguments that contradict my personal beliefs, I start to see the other side of the story and become empathetic about that side. This skill has helped me to neutralize many strong feelings I had over the years and grow empathy towards all ideas. While the goal of debating is to sharpen your mind to defend your ideologies, it actually does the opposite in life. It smoothens your brain to accept and see the other side of the coin and empathize with them.
Facts are secondary to ideas.
We live in a world where data is limitless and access to information is abundant. The edge you can have as an individual over others because you have information is limited cause there is a high chance that others can also access the same information. Within the British parliamentary debating, the weight they give to data is secondary to the quality of the arguments you build. Therefore, we always prioritize arguments and logic over information and data.
This practice can train our brains to make connections between ideas that have never been connected before. With this skill coupled with access to high amounts of data and information, you will start to see some amazing opportunities.
Examples carry less value.
One of the biggest mistakes I have been doing when arguing is to come up with examples to validate my point. I kept doing the same mistake till I was pointed out why it is in fact a mistake to rely on examples. When I build my argument on examples, it is quite easy to break off such arguments by simply coming up with another example that contradicts my case. If I say an argument is true because in this example it makes sense, the only thing the opponents have to do is to come up with an example that says otherwise and my entire built-up is collapsed. Therefore, in debating it is recommended to use as less examples as possible to support an argument. It is one thing to build an argument and then use examples to support it from the top. But it is very dangerous to build an argument on top of examples.
When we are faced with a tough decision in life, we tend to look at others to find examples to help our decision. It is ok to get inspired by them. But if we try to make our life decisions based on such examples we can get into trouble in many ways. First, the examples we take into consideration are not always the perfect replication of our situation. There could be so many differences that we don’t see that affect them. Making decisions with limited knowledge of such differences can be very harmful. Secondly, you might end up getting more confused as different people have responded to such questions in different ways. Finally and most importantly, when you base your decisions on other examples, you tend not to take ownership of such decisions. This can only lead you to failure.
Debating in general has changed my life in many ways. The above are some new changes I realised by being in this new format of debating. While debating as a hobby might not be for everyone, I am sure you can learn a thing or two from the lessons I shared. If you are a debating enthusiast, or not, I would love to hear from you in the comments about this discussion.
